Loving Yourself More: How to Practice Self-Love
Self-love is an essential part of living a healthy and successful life. It requires moving away from self-rejection and instead embracing oneself with kindness. Self-love is about making the conscious decision to put your well-being first, taking care of yourself, and advocating for your needs. Furthermore, it involves being mindful of the people and circumstances that you choose to associate with and how those will benefit both yourself and your ambitions. Making these important decisions demands reflection, self-awareness, and a commitment to protecting yourself. Investing in self-love is undoubtedly an empowering way to maximize potential in all aspects of life.
Developing and increasing your self-love is not all about bubble baths and gifts, although these could be part of the equation. For real, honest, and deep self-love, it’s important to understand that self-love is not about constantly giving in to every whim or desire. Instead, it’s about engaging in behaviors that help you grow as a person and live up to your fullest potential. It involves challenging yourself, accepting yourself as you are, setting boundaries with others, motivating yourself, showing kindness and respect for yourself in everything you do, having faith in your abilities and capabilities, and solving problems constructively rather than focusing on obstacles. By engaging in these activities while being compassionate with yourself through any mistakes or missteps made along the way, you cultivate a genuine self-love that can enhance your life more profoundly than any bath bomb or trinket.
These next exercises can be challenging, but their purpose is invaluable. They allow you to take the intentional time and effort to connect with yourself on a deeper level—an action that your future self will thank you for. By listening closely to yourself and engaging in this mindful pursuit, you become more aware and present in the moment. These exercises offer a chance to slow down, reflect, and gain clarity on how you want to move forward into your future.
Practice compassion instead of judgment
Self-criticism is often seen as a motivator, but in actuality, it can soon morph into something that hinders us from progressing and growing. We may criticize ourselves for certain personality traits, believing this criticism will help us to make changes; however, more often than not, it only causes emotional pain. To get over such obstacles, we must learn to give ourselves compassion instead of judgment. We must confront these painful situations head-on by understanding our emotional reactions and providing ourselves with supportive encouragement rather than harshness. Taking even the smallest steps toward progress allows us the opportunity to build better habits that can eventually lead to lasting change.
It can be challenging to motivate yourself to take positive action when desired outcomes seem hard to come by. Although it’s important to recognize the hard truths about your behavior, it’s just as important that you approach yourself with understanding and compassion. A wise and caring friend, parent, teacher, or mentor could remind you that outer achievement is often a result of inner transformation. Instead of using language or messaging that is critical, try to focus on self-care practices that help you to be more centered and productive. Listen for words coming from a place of love, supporting the idea that taking care of yourself in mind and body will lead to radiating health and well-being.
Everyone has unwanted traits, and it’s natural to feel self-judgment toward ourselves because of them. Unfortunately, self-judgment rarely serves us in a constructive way. As you reach the point of judgment about yourself in the future, take a moment and be self-aware: identify the source of your pain and give yourself the compassion it requires. Then, consciously shift your inner dialogue to a motivating, encouraging mindset that encourages you to pursue improvement instead of punishing yourself for not being perfect already. With practice, you will come to understand that kindness and understanding can provide far more incentive than self-judgment.
Be open to constructive criticism
Although self-love involves cultivating and sustaining positive thoughts about our achievements, it’s also about recognizing the potential for growth. Self-love entails being aware of areas in our lives that we can improve and heading toward becoming the finest versions of ourselves. As such, it might require us to be open to constructive criticism—not feeling defensive when someone points out certain behaviors or habits we could correct. Ultimately, instead of shying away from constructive feedback, self-love involves embracing and using it as a tool to reach higher levels of personal development.
Everyone has areas in their life that can use improvement, whether it be a relationship, a skill to strengthen, or an old habit to break. What is important is that we take the time to recognize when something needs attention and make constructive changes. If we do not admit our shortcomings, we will never be able to foster meaningful growth within ourselves. Acknowledging when we’ve been unreasonable toward somebody or have done something that would impede our progress takes courage, but it’s essential for maturity and growth.
Taking accountability for our mistakes and actively working toward bettering ourselves can be a daunting task. However, an effective technique to accomplish that is to simply acknowledge the situation, forgive yourself, and then plan accordingly. We might need to apologize to people we’ve wronged or take steps toward improving parts of our lives. If we’re resilient in this quest of ours, we can truly make meaningful progress and ultimately make a difference in our lives.
Be mindful with decision-making
When making decisions, check in with yourself to better understand if that decision impacts your journey toward self-love. By asking yourself a few simple questions such as, “Will this bring me more ease and flow in my life?” and “Will this help me to grow as a person?” can quickly assess whether or not a particular decision is in line with the practice of self-love. Much of our journey toward personal growth comes down to the small decisions we make, so why not filter those decisions through the lens of self-love?
Clean out your closet
Everyone deserves to feel and look wonderful, and our wardrobe is an integral part of achieving this. Our clothes can be an expression of our beliefs, what we value, and who we strive to be. However, feeling obligated to find something nice to wear when there is very little in our closet that makes us feel good can become a trying experience. Today's challenge is to clean out your wardrobe—get rid of items that do not fit or that you do not like. Make sure to keep practical and comfortable pieces that make you feel fabulous! Consider donating or swapping your old clothes with friends instead of sending them straight to the landfill. As you move forward, commit to buying garments that make you happy and empower you every time you put them on.
Mini Acts of Self-Love
Be patient with yourself
Embrace where you are in life and recognize the progress that has gotten you there. Be mindful of your current surroundings, circumstances, and emotions, and make the most of them. You’re capable of understanding and appreciating your growth even if it’s subtle. Revel in being patient with yourself; be kind to all of the small victories within each day. Trust in your personal timing—it’s only taking you closer to achieving your desired outcome. Allow yourself to be present, where you are—right here, right now.
Forgive yourself
It’s important to view mistakes as a learning lesson rather than as a punishment. Embrace every opportunity—good or bad—and develop strategies for growth. Refrain from ruminating on what went wrong in the past and instead focus on steps toward progress. Forgiving yourself helps boost self-esteem, reframe negative thinking patterns, and opens you up to new possibilities. Recognize your successes as far are greater than your failures to appreciate the fullness of life.
Celebrate your achievements
Taking time to celebrate your successes is a crucial part of personal growth and self-love. Having a written list of the goals and achievements you’ve accomplished can help encourage continued success while also immediately highlighting how far you’ve come. Additionally, it serves as a regular reminder that difficult feats can be conquered, no matter how hard they may seem. All it takes is a combination of determination, intentionality, and devotion in order to reach your goals.
Treat yourself to something nice
Taking the time to do something nice for ourselves can be greatly beneficial. Whether it’s allowing an extra hour of sleep on the weekend, taking a long soak in a hot bubble bath, or picking up your favorite snack from the grocery store, these small but meaningful acts of self-care and kindness can make all the difference. Not only will they bring short-term joy and relief, but they will also get us into the habit of practicing self-love regularly and promote a sense of accomplishment each time we indulge in some self-pampering.
Move your body
Regularly engaging in physical exercises you love is an important part of leading a healthy lifestyle. Whether you enjoy going for a long run outdoors, sweating it out at the gym, or taking a calming yoga class, all types of physical activities can have benefits. Exercise can help to reduce stress, improve your mood, and provide an outlet to take care of your body both mentally and physically. Moreover, dedicating time to exercising also helps with improving focus and concentration as well as building self-confidence. Sticking with physical exercises that you love will help you to form a habit of consistently engaging in physical activity that brings both mental peace and physical health benefits to your life.
Make time to enjoy your hobbies
Taking the time to be alone can be extremely rewarding. It allows you to focus on yourself and your interests without external distractions. In solitude, you can expand your interests by practicing hobbies, creative activities, or anything else that brings your joy. Creating a form of self-care will help to build mental strength and increase self-reflection. It also helps build resilience so that when interacting with others, you’re more likely to stay level-headed and see situations from multiple perspectives. Consequently, taking time for yourself regularly can improve the way you interact with those around you.
Perform a simple act of kindness
Helping another person can be an incredibly rewarding experience. By taking the time to do something nice for someone else, you’re making a positive difference in their life—and ultimately your own. Consider performing a simple act of kindness such as offering a compliment, helping someone with a task, or simply spending some time listening and showing you care. These small efforts can have an enormous impact and create a ripple effect of positivity in the world around us.
Spend time with people you love
Spending time with people who bring joy to your life is a great way to boost mental well-being. Surrounding yourself with individuals who value and appreciate you encourages feelings of self-love and acceptance, helping to raise your confidence levels. Moreover, being in the company of people that make you feel loved and accepted is a powerful mood enhancer. Take some time each day to spend with those people because they can have a profound positive impact on your happiness.
Making a commitment to loving ourselves and practicing self-compassion is easier said than done. However, the rewards are endless. This work does not only improve the way we perceive our current selves but boosts our confidence for the future. Making a pledge for self-love encourages us to be mindful of our actions and gives us permission to make mistakes along the way. We must adopt an attitude of understanding toward ourselves. None of us are perfect, and that is okay! Learning to prioritize self-acceptance will bring us one step closer to developing a positive self-image and increased confidence in our authentic selves.
Here is a free digital download to help you on your self-love journey: My Self-Love Journey Journal